• Abhishek Kashyap

The D Word

When I was first faced with the idea of having to go through a divorce, I was utterly terrified. A close friend asked me a few days after my "break-up", hey when do you think you'll apply for a divorce? and it gave me intense nausea. I gave myself 3-4 months to relax and get comfortable with the D word. But it didn't happen. On a random day, I opened twitter and the first tweet I saw was by a woman casually talking about her divorce. I immediately DM-ed her asking for help. Within 2 days, I was sitting opposite her at a coffee shop. Here was a gorgeous lady so confident of how normal divorce it, and how it was a very right decision for her. And there I was, nervously sitting barely able to even say the word out loud. But those 2 hours changed my thinking largely. I walked out feeling OKAY, and with the first ray of hope that divorce isn't going to ruin my future. And I also told myself - one day, I hope to be this woman for someone else. Even if one other person recognizes divorce to be normal, it will mean so much.

When I was done with my divorce, I felt so relieved/free/strong/happy and thoroughly convinced I've done the right thing. And that's when I started talking about it. Writing about it because at least 8 people have asked me this particular question in the past week, thank you for doing that. I'm so thankful to be able to pen down my thoughts here.

Another fantastic consequence of being open about it online: nobody dares (bothers, I guess?) to tell me anything negative or show me the ugly side of stigma. In person or otherwise. Including family. I've not been entirely rid of a few comments here and there, but when I see the big picture, a lot of loud mouths have been shut the hell up. 🙌🏽

To me, it's important to talk about it to shatter stigma. A big thank you to all of you who've trusted me with your stories so far. 🥂 If you can, and if you want to, if you feel strongly, and if your mental health allows you: do not keep quiet about it. Use your voice, every little word makes a difference.

Story Credit - Shasvathi Siva

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